Role Reversal At The Gun Range

 Role Reversal At The Gun Range

This is from December 27, 2016! 

We were walking in this afternoon and I held the door for an older gentleman who was leaving. He spoke to me, saying, "Have a good day, Coach." It caught me off guard because nobody outside of relatives knows me here in the middle of Wichita, Kansas. Then, I remembered that it's monogrammed on the chest of the WCS jacket I was wearing and I got my bearings back. But, it was the last time for several hours that I felt like a coach. You see, I was entering a gun range with my nephew, Nate, and my niece, Karis. Nate has taken up shooting, purchasing a pistol back in the fall, and going through training. At Thanksgiving, he told me all about how he got interested in his new hobby. I told him I'd like to go with him sometime and sometime turned out to be today. It was Nate's treat and I found out, an expensive one. After putting on goggles and ear protectors, we entered the shooting area. I discovered how jumpy I was initially due to the boom boom boom of the shots and and the reverberations. It took some time to acclimate to the environment but after an hour squeezing the trigger, I barely noticed any more.

As I had only fired a gun a couple of times and that outdoors at a family reunion, I had almost no experience with a firearm. Nate took me through the process step by step, from stance to aim to hand/fingers/thumb position to working the safety to pulling the trigger. I wasn't very good but I did improve as we pulled the targets in for inspection. Nate was good at giving advice in increments. Do this. Change that slightly. Good job that round. While Nate was reloading for me, Karis and I talked about how learning to shoot a gun was sort of like learning how to shoot a free throw; stance, hand position, routine, picking up a target. The difference is that I can still shoot 80% from the free throw line and can only dream of hitting the target 80% of the time. When we finished, Nate was very complimentary of my rookie efforts and he also told me he thought Karis was a natural. I know nothing about shooting but he hit the nail on the head. Karis was very accurate even though she only has had a couple of outings at the range. Maybe some shooters are born and not trained!

You know, I held Nathan the day he was born, only hours after his birth. And now, only hours ago, he was my teacher. Funny how the wheels of time spin, isn't it? Part of humility is knowing what you don't know. That's easier in some arenas than others. But it's also easier to take instruction from someone near your own age than someone you babysat as an infant. In Luke 6:40, Jesus makes this statement:
The student is not above the teacher, but everyone who is fully trained will be like their teacher.
Maybe that applies to nephews and uncles, too. (And maybe brothers and sisters as Nate is passing on what he knows to Karis.) We teach what we know to enrich others and there is fulfillment in both sides of the equation. Sometimes, we even shoot a bulls eye. (Well, it probably was just a lucky shot on my end!)

Applicable quote of the day:
“Experience teaches only the teachable.” 
 Aldous Huxley

God bless,
Steve
Luke 18:1

The Conversation

 The Conversation

 

Levitt Stadium, East Hill Park, York, Nebraska

This entry is about a short talk that changed my entire life- it's from November 14, 2020.
Our middle and high school is meeting virtually for several weeks now and the plan is to be back on campus, Lord willing, after Thanksgiving. The ironic thing is that in some ways, this has been a very enjoyable year for me. I love my students and players and have found the skill to do things tech-wise I could not have imagined last spring.... although I am definitely still learning. The situation we all face has left me with more time to think and wonder about my life. Today, as I walked the outfield of our beautiful WCS baseball field, I began thinking about my biggest regret in life which is not marrying and having kids. I ran through a mental checklist of exes and started asking myself, what if, which is always a rabbit hole to explore. What if she hadn't dumped me or what if I hadn't been a jerk to this young lady... and before long, I thought of girlfriends whose memory had long been dormant. This much I can say with certainty- my life would be drastically different if there was a Mrs. Hawley. Being single, while excruciatingly lonely at times, has given me the flexibility to do things in my educational/coaching careers. When you don't have to pass decisions through the lens of a spouse and offspring, choices are easier to make. Needless to say, it was me playing my own version of The Beatles', "In My Life" mentally as I walked through the freshly cut grass.

But as I thought, something came to mind that equally or maybe even more decisively caused another fork in my road to appear. Towards the end of my sophomore college baseball season, Coach Steve Small approached me about coaching in the American Legion baseball program that he had taken over in my hometown of York, Nebraska. I had four years as a player in the Legion system and even though coaching had not crossed my mind, I was intrigued and took the job. In fact, I kept it for three summers and it led to my first post college position, coaching and teaching in south Georgia. From there, as years elapsed, I made my way to Tennessee and now Houston. They say the rest is history but the story is still being told so I'd have to call it something else.

The funny thing as I reflect is that I have no recollection of Coach Small broaching the subject with me. I'm sure it did not seem that it was a life changing moment but it absolutely turned out to be. My plan up to that point had been to earn a Masters and then Doctorate in US History and settle into a life as a college professor. I can't truthfully say my goals changed immediately- it took a number of years to get past the Doctorate dream- but the die was cast. I fell in love with coaching baseball which turned into love of coaching basketball which of course, led to a dual track career that many of us have navigated. No one ever calls me Mister, They all call me Coach even if they have never played on one of my teams. It's a title I'm comfortable with.

Three days ago, there was a Facebook message for me from a former student. It was his birthday and I gave him a shoutout as I always do. He's now a teacher/coach and it was Veterans' Day so he took his students to the downtown square in the small Tennessee town to watch the patriotic celebration. When they returned to school, Jon recited In Flanders Fields to the kids who were amazed at his knowledge of poetry, a poem we covered each year in my history classes. This is what he wrote to me:
Up until last year, I didn’t know that you subconsciously put the blue print in my mind to be a good teacher. Here's the thing. I had no idea I had an impact on Jon. He is undoubtedly having an impact on the kids he teaches and coaches. If he is correct, then Coach Small plays a big role in that impact, even though he has never met Coach Small. I am no scientist and don't have any real knowledge of the Butterfly Effect, the theory that the smallest thing can greatly change future events in the natural world. There are surely similarities in the way we live our lives as both Jesus in Matthew 12 and the writer of Hebrews in 4:13 speak of giving account for our words/thoughts/actions. Our lives are not in a vacuum; interaction with others, believers and non believers, is the basis of discipleship. We have the free will to make decisions and then live with them. In some cases, others live with the consequences of our choices and vice versa. I can't know what life would have been like if I had married but I do know what life is like because Coach Small took a chance on an immature twenty year old. Ephesians 2:10 tells us we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works which God prepared in advance for us to do. In my case, I think the Lord used Coach Small as a subcontractor. That means I am someone else's subcontractor. In fact, all of us can be if we  let Him use us in the Kingdom. Be careful how you make a difference.

Applicable quote of the day:
To me, baseball has always been a reflection of life. Like life, it adjusts. It survives everything.
Willie Stargell

God bless,
Steve
Luke 18:1

A Civics Lesson In The Checkout Line At Wal-Mart

 

A Civics Lesson In the Checkout Line At Wal-Mart

Voting is not a right granted to everyone at every time. This is from November 6, 2016.
This is basketball season now. Since I have limited time to prepare meals and I loathe the fast food alternative, I often make myself a crockpot on Sunday to last me through the week. As I write, I have brown rice on the stove that will be mixed in with the healthy chicken stroganoff gurgling in the slow cooker. (If you want the recipe which even I can't mess up, send me a message!) After working out yesterday morning, I drove the the nearby Wal-Mart Neighborhood Market to purchase the necessary items for this week's evening menu. It didn't take long. I looked for the shortest line and found myself at the counter of a young man who I guessed was from Africa. He had checked out the contents of my cart several times before. Once, he complimented me on the sports shirt I was wearing, thanks to Sally. I like compliments so I enjoy going through his station. (I also know the joy of checking out Saturday morning shoppers thanks to my four years at the Jack And Jill Supermarket in Nebraska!) As I pulled out my checkbook, he asked a simple question:
"Have you voted yet?"
I explained that I was going to wait until Tuesday. I turned the question back around. He explained he was wasn't a citizen yet but hoped to be in about two years if I heard him correctly. I asked and he told me he was from Nigeria. I countered that I had taught many brilliant kids from his homeland so it must be a nation with intelligent DNA! He laughed. I learned he is a college student majoring in IT- I predicted his job skills would always be in demand. His days working as a cashier are numbered, I further predict. Employers are always looking for employees who are skilled and customer friendly, especially with diploma in hand. He'll make it in the world

This is what I took away from our two to three minute encounter; he just expected that as a citizen, I would be voting. He just assumed I would exercise my right to freely cast my ballot. He didn't ask IF I was voting- my guess it would be inconceivable to him that I wouldn't. Truthfully, I've sat out some elections but not for any protest. Federal elections are always held early in November on Tuesdays, coinciding with opening games for high school basketball squads and I've at times let busyness get in the way of voting. I bet my new friend won't let inconvenience distract him from the polling places when he becomes an American. Hope he gets his chance.

You know, as Christians we have certain rights as well. We have the right to call God our Father and speak to Him anytime about anything. We have the right to rejoice in the forgiveness of our sins by the blood of our Savior, Jesus Christ, shed on the cross. We have the right to belong to a second human family, those who like us have also been washed in the blood of the lamb. And the list doesn't stop there. Why wouldn't I freely take these privileges which belong to me? It should be a given that I take advantage of my standing as a citizen in the realms above. Jesus chastised His men for excitement over casting out demons, countering they should rejoice their names were written in heaven. My name is listed in Harris County, Texas voter registration rolls but that is simply temporary. The election into the Kingdom of Heaven is the one that matters eternally. And there will be no absentee ballots that day which isn't marked on any calendar. So go forth to your civic duty and vote on Tuesday if you haven't yet. But please remember that our allegiance belongs first to that celestial home where our final address will be. God bless America.

Applicable quote of the day:
Nobody will ever deprive the American people of the right to vote except the American people themselves and the only way they could do this is by not voting.
Franklin D. Roosevelt

God bless,
Steve
Luke 18:1

The Messengers

 

The Messengers

This is from March 25, 2014. Some of these kiddos referenced below became my students!

Some days, the news is almost overwhelmingly bad on both a world and personal level. The news outlets constantly update the Russian takeover in Ukraine while the search goes on for the remains of the presumed crashed Malaysian Airlines jet with its 239 passengers. Domestically, the death toll has risen to fourteen with many unaccounted for in Washington state after a horrific mudslide on Saturday. Closer to home for me was the discovering this morning on Facebook that the 8th grade son and several other relatives of one of my former students in Georgia were killed in the crash of a small plane in Colorado several days ago. The communications revolution has left us with the constant exposure to pain in numbing detail and bracing ourselves for the next body blow. Sometimes they come in wicked combinations.

And yet, this afternoon, as I took a shortcut across our enclosed playground back to my wing of Westbury Christian, I was hugged- OK, tackled- by five giggling first graders who wanted to share with me their joy of recess and life in general. After letting go, Tara breathlessly informed me she was bringing her change for the orphans in Honduras and Haiti on Friday and that her bank bottle was already more than half-filled! One of the kids told me my desk was messy- they are so perceptive- and I promised to go clean it up! As I stepped out of the sunlight back into the environment of my classroom, I glowed a little bit and the hope for the newest generation was reborn yet again. In some of His final words to His closest friends in John 16, Jesus prophesied that, "In this world, you will have trouble.'' But praise God, He didn't leave it there, adding, "But take heart! I have overcome the world!" We need reminders of the overcoming, the reason to not quit or give up the hope we have as believers. Sometimes, I think the Lord sends us reminders of that hope. Today, His messengers were disguised as a quintet of first grade girls.

Applicable quote of the day:
“There's nothing more contagious than the laughter of young children; it doesn't even have to matter what they're laughing about.”
Criss Jami

God bless,
Steve
Luke 18:1

The Crease

 The Crease

I have no idea why but this entry is in the top 5 of number of views of every blog I've ever written! It's from October 4, 2016.

Madison is one of my favorites ever. A junior now, she played basketball for me in middle school, a career which began with my recruiting her out of a PE class. She's an excellent student to go along with her athletic endeavors on the varsity level in basketball and volleyball. Last Friday, we took Test #4 in my three sections of Gospels. I'm pretty sure she made a 99% but I don't have her grade in front of me. This isn't about her A on the exam. Madison made another impression on me during that testing process but not in the way you might imagine.

We don't have seating charts typically in my classes unless dictated by chattiness. Madison sits front and center, right where you expect superior students to park themselves. But when I handed Madison her blank test four days ago, she made an odd request: she asked for a different test. Of course, I asked why and her reply caught me off guard:
"Because this one has a crease in it."
Sure enough, it did at the bottom right corner, apparently being marred in this way when being picked up from our print office. I thought she was joking- she wasn't. I acquiesced and gave her a second one, while kidding her about the swap. It didn't distract her to the extent of hurting her average. It's stayed on my mind so this afternoon, I asked Jean, my senior teacher's aide who aced the same class last year if it would bother her.
"Of course!"
Why?
"It has a crease in it!"
Just to make sure, I asked the young ladies in my eighth period, eighth grade Bible class this afternoon. Unanimous agreement with the lovely Madison. It wasn't the first time I've been outvoted by the fairer gender and I'm sure it won't be the last. I've quit arguing and just accepted the inevitable. Life's easier that way.

Isn't it funny how we all have small annoyances that baffle other people, or in this case, the opposite sex. We all have them, regardless of party affiliation or ethnicity or age or occupation or gender. My little thing might be your big thing. Ironically, our quiz today in Gospels from Luke 6 covered Jesus' illustration of the speck and the plank in the eyes. Your speck, I'm convinced, is often my plank and vice versa. Typically, it's unimportant to one of us, like the slight fold in the paper is to me. Making big things out of nothing only leads to trouble and sometimes, heartache. We know people like that. Sometimes, we are people like that. Let it go. Usually, it's not worth the paper it was written on or the fight that may ensue. I give in. You win, Madison!

Applicable quote of the day:
It has long been an axiom of mine that the little things are infinitely the most important.
 Arthur Conan Doyle

God bless,
Steve
Luke 18:1

Morning In May

Morning In May

This past  March 31 marked the fifteenth anniversary of the death of my mother, a saintly woman to the day of her passing, even if it was not in her cognitive senses anymore. People have said Dave and Scott were more like Dad and I'm more like Mom. I couldn't go wrong either way but our mother was one of a kind. She did not know us the last years of her life but it never robbed her of her dignity. I wrote this on May 13, 2007.

It was one of the most beautiful songs of the rock and roll era but I remember it for the wrong reasons. Penned by Dave Loggins and recorded by the rock group, Three Dog Night, Pieces Of April spoke of love in retrospect after gently blossoming into the more mature stage of the relationship. Unfortunately, in one of the less heroic moments of my earlier years, I used the chorus lyrics to explain to an incredibly sweet and wonderful girl why it was all over from my not quite ready to commit to anything perspective:
"I've got pieces of April
I keep 'em in a memory bouquet
I've got pieces of April
But it's a morning in May."
I guess the point I was trying to make was that although we got off to a terrific start, reality in the form of our moving away from each other mandated our separate directions in love as well. You've heard guys using the you're too good for me line? It was breathtakingly accurate in my case. I immediately felt guilty, especially delivering the message in a letter instead of face-to-face. And in the process, I ruined a song I really liked.

Messing around with YouTube recently, I typed in the song title with the chance I might hear it again since it never plays on the radio. Sure enough, it popped up but with a twist. It was coupled with film clips from the movie The Notebook which seems to be some sort of women's romance film. A husband reads to his Alzheimer's suffering wife from a love story she had written down. Set in a nursing home, the elderly couple.....Wait, I don't want to spoil the ending I discovered in Wikipedia if you haven't seen it! Anyway, the linking of the movie and the song reminded me of where my folks are in life. Dad can live in both the present and the past while we aren't sure where Mom's memories are cast. Today is Mother's Day. This May morning at the end of worship service, I helped pass out long stem carnations to all the mothers in the congregation. I wish I could have handed one to my mom. I also wish she could comprehend that today is a special day for her and all the other women the Lord selected as mothers to the human race. A few minutes ago, I spoke to Mom on the phone and heard her whisper a very faint, "I love you" to her second born son. It became the latest flower in my memory bouquet. In Proverbs 31, the children of the noble woman described in detail call her blessed. That's my mother but she doesn't understand anymore when I tell her. Maybe Dad can read this to her just like in the movie. I love you, Mom.

Applicable quote of the day:

"There is no way to be a perfect mother and a million ways to be a good one."

Jill Churchill

God bless,

Steve, son of Nelda Chesshir Hawley

Luke 18:1

The Jewel

 

The Jewel

 

Eight Christmases ago, I wrote a blog about Jenson and how she was concerned she got more presents than Baby Jesus got from the wise men. This is about her earlier life, from  2012.

I held Jenson for the first time today. As soon as I walked into Dave and Sally's house this morning, she was thrust into my arms and remained peacefully for thirty minutes. Jenson, the four month old first child of Ben and Courtney, is my great niece. She is good natured, blue eyed, and I am delighted to be genetically linked to this little angel. And according to the word on the street, Jenson smells incredibly good. As I held her, I thought about the last hymn in our church song book when I was little, # 600 in Great Songs Of The Church: 

When He cometh, when He cometh
To make up His jewels,
All His jewels, precious jewels,
His loved and His own.

(Refrain)
Like the stars of the morning,
His brightness adorning,
They shall shine in their beauty,
Bright gems for His crown.

He will gather, He will gather
The gems for His kingdom;
All the pure ones, all the bright ones,
His loved and His own.

Little children, little children,
Who love their Redeemer,
Are the jewels, precious jewels,
His loved and His own.

When He Cometh was written by William Cushing, a Disciples of Christ minister, in 1856. Cushing penned it for the children in his congregation
and he perfectly describes the youngest among us as precious  jewels. That's as close to a flawless definition as there can be about Jenson, who is named in honor of Courtney's family. She's a blessed baby. Jenson is descended from families who honor marriage and most importantly, who honor God. She will be raised with stability and an overwhelming blanket of love. Jenson will grow up to be a servant to humanity and a child of the king because that is what she will be taught every day of her life. What a Thanksgiving blessing Jenson is for her parents/grandparents/aunts/uncles/cousins this November. I grieve for those babies who will never glimpse the wonderful life she will lead. 

Applicable quote of the day:
"This is a place where grandmothers hold babies on their laps under the stars and whisper in their ears that the lights in the sky are holes in the floor of heaven.”
Rick Bragg



God bless,
Steve
Luke 18:1