Sally, Shirts, And Stripes

 

Sally, Shirts, And Stripes

My sisters-in-law, Sally and Karen, have  had great impact on my life. This entry, from July 19, 2009, is about Sally and my clothes.

I only have two credit cards and one is from KOHL'S. Every month, KOHL'S sends coupon to their card holders with the possibility of 15%, 20%, or 30% off the next purchase. Several weeks ago, I peeled the sticker and...30%! It was like winning the lottery! Since there is a KOHL'S near Dave and Sally's house, I decided to cash in my discount in Kansas, buying a few items for school. As Sally and I discussed my purchases and whether I should buy a suit that was on sale, I realized my beautiful sister-in-law is of the opinion that I have no sense of fashion. She may be right- our viewpoints on men's clothing are diametrically opposed. My 30% coupon was applied to a pair of Dockers pants and two oxford dress shirts, one white while the other is from CHAPS, white with small blue checks. Since I normally wear solid or pinstriped shirts, I wasn't sure what tie I should wear to worship with the blue checked oxford. Did you know there are websites that match shirts and ties in acceptable combinations? I discovered it's proper to wear a striped tie with a checked shirt so I did. I'm back in Houston now but my fondest dream is that Sally would have applauded as I went out the door this morning; I live for her approval!

Like I said, I know little about fashion. I have heard that vertical stripes make one appear taller while horizontal stripes have the effect of adding a few pounds. I now know when it is permissible for a man to wear stripes for his neck wear. But, that use of stripes is strictly superficial. There was one for whom the term stripes had a different connotation. In his first epistle, Peter wrote that the Savior, "Himself bore our sins in His own body on the tree, that we, having died to sins, might live for righteousness—by whose stripes you were healed.. " (1 Peter 2:24, NKJV) The apostle tells us that the stripes/wounds of Jesus liberated us from sin. The agony He bore in the beatings, the mockings, the crucifixion made our salvation possible. Just three verses previously, Peter writes that the sufferings of Jesus serve as an example that Christians are to follow. Paul penned in Galatians 3:27 that, "all of you who were baptized into Christ have clothed yourselves with Christ." We're promised the wardrobe of Jesus? That's an outfit I can live with. No more websites or color schemes, checks or solids. The stripes of Jesus will always match the clothing of Christ, even if we've had a checkered past.

Applicable quote of the day:
"I have always dressed according to certain Basic Guy Fashion Rules,including: ‘Both of your socks should always be the same color.’ Or they should at least both be fairly dark."
Dave Barry

God bless,

Steve
Luke 18:1

Forever Doesn't Last As Long As It Used To

 

Forever Doesn't Last As Long As It Used To

I am absolutely no marriage expert even though I have preached  about 15 weddings. Marriage is supposed to be til death do us part. Sadly, it sometimes ends up poorly. This is from October of 2010.

I read the news yesterday and it saddened me. Country music singer Randy Travis and his wife of nineteen years, Elizabeth, have divorced. The former spouses are also business partners- she is his manager- and will apparently continue that relationship but the one that matters has been shattered. Websites and gossip shows are always filled with failed celebrity marriages but this one particularly bothers me, if only for one reason: Randy Travis performed, and is probably most noted for, the best marriage song of all time, Forever And Ever, Amen. I guess the final lines to this classic have lost their luster:
If you wonder how long I'll be faithful
Just listen to how this song ends.
I'm gonna love you forever and ever
Forever and ever, Amen.
I guess the cynical part of me now has a different final chorus to think about when it comes to considering the love of a man and woman, Michael Martin Murphey's, What's Forever For:
So, what's the glory in living?
Doesn't anybody ever stay together anymore?
And if love never lasts forever, tell me
What's Forever For?

The Bible uses the term forever 290 times (in the New International Version, at least) and never once in the connotation of marital bliss. Still, the concept of the sanctity of marriage as well as the superiority of its permanence is constant. This morning in our worship service, the focus was on our teenagers. These youngsters, along with their folks, just completed a True Love Waits program based on the Song of Solomon. The young people, with the public blessing of moms and dads, pledged their sexual purity until their wedding. The parents gave their children a ring to symbolize the commitment and the congregation pledged our support as well. These kids are on the right track but we all know that there are derailments lurking. In the great chapter of love, 1 Corinthians 13, Paul wrote that even after everything else was gone, love, along with faith and hope, would remain with love being the highest virtue. That sounds like forever to me, even if it's not a line in a song.

Applicable quote of the day:
“Divorce is the psychological equivalent of a triple coronary by-pass. After such a monumental assault on the heart, it takes years to amend all the habits and attitudes that led up to it.”
Mary Kay Blakely

God bless,
Steve
Luke 18:1


Forever and Ever,Amen
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sgJXbIP83A8

What's Forever For?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UalVQCCTNPg

The Integrity Of Cyrus Field

 

The Integrity Of Cyrus Field

The world could use a healthy dose of this historical character's character! This is from February 19, 2018.
Several days ago, I was watching you tube while eating my supper. My dining fare was American Experience, a PBS documentary series focusing on American history. The topic of that particular episode was Cyrus Field, a New York financier who was the primary force behind the laying of the trans Atlantic telegraph cable, linking the US and Europe. It was a fascinating story and I learned a good deal- the former history teacher in me is never far from the surface! Field was dealt a number of defeats in his quest but after roughly a decade of disappointments and setbacks, was able to see his dream of linking east and west come to fruition. It would not be an overstatement to say that that this adventure changed the world.

The most impressive part of the Field narrative, though, had nothing to do with oceans and cable. In the introductory section of the film, the story is told of Field buying a nearly bankrupt paper company at age twenty. As the new owner, he agreed with the creditors for 30 cents on the dollar to settle debts. Within several years, the company was turning a profit so Field did something few would do. Even though he had no legal obligation to do so, Field returned to those creditors and paid off the entire debt. The narrator commented how that act gave the still young entrepreneur tremendous respect and credibility in the New York business community. Would any of those who had accepted the 30 cent solution expected Field to have made this next step? My guess, not being in the world of commerce, is no; the narrator made it seem like this was far from common. My guess is also that that type of integrity in the market place is even harder to find today.

I spent some time at the beginning of each of my classes one day this past week talking about integrity. The day before, I had seen some suspicious  behavior in one of my five periods so it was as good a time as any to preach. I told them that every situation I see them in is recorded in my mind; in the classroom, with a teacher in the hallway, on the basketball court or on the football field, standing in line in the cafeteria, interacting with their peers. The perception of any hint of dishonesty colors my view and anyone else who would hold high expectations for them. There are kids I expect are always honest and those I believe are honest only when it is convenient or to their benefit. Some youngsters I trust implicitly and some I watch closely. Truth be told,  I might be pleasantly surprised with some and with some, bitterly disappointed. 

I tell my students John the Baptist would never get a preaching job today- yelled at leaders, dressed like a caveman and ate like a survivalist, went to jail. But, along with proclaiming that Jesus was the lamb of God, John stressed honesty and integrity to those not noted for those traits, soldiers and tax collectors. What a good lesson for us two thousand years later. Every profession needs those same instructions; dentists, lawyers, salesmen, preachers, coaches, teachers. Integrity derives from the Latin integer meaning wholeness. When we have integrity, we are whole and complete. When we lack integrity, we lack closure in our character. There are gaps for dishonest thoughts and actions to seep in and out. If we were more steeped in integrity as a culture, I wouldn't have the need to move desks apart and require all the kids to grade their quizzes in brown markers to make cheating harder. We wouldn't have to constantly change passwords and we could leave our car doors unlocked. Our Father in heaven knew- the Ten Commandments dealt with integrity matters like stealing and lying and adultery. The problem is ancient but so is the solution. In fact, the solution is etched in stone.

Applicable quote of the day:
If I were asked to say the most important things that lead to a successful life, I should say that, first of all, was integrity - unimpeachable integrity. 
Charles M. Schwab


God bless,
Steve
Luke 18:1

Looking In The Mirror- Chapter 2

 

Looking In The Mirror- Chapter 2

 

This was originally posted on February 21, 2022.
We worked on one of my favorite assignments in our classes last week. Back in October, one of our written memory verses was James 1:22-24:
"Do not merely listen to the word and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says. Anyone who listens to the word but does not do what it says is like a man who looks at his face in a mirror and after looking at himself, goes away and immediately forgets what he looks like.''
We discussed the meaning and I brought up that Mom, in her late stages of Alzheimer's, did not recognize her own image. I told the kids that sometimes at the end of the day, I look at myself in the mirror, and don't always like what I see. I talked about Paul's reference to mirrors in 1st Corinthians 13:12 and read examples from my students of ten years ago. The kids finished this statement: 'When I look in the mirror, I see....' Every student was allowed complete confidentiality. My students were very honest. Over the next few nights, I'll run some of the responses of those who wanted to share.  Some will choke you up. All are used by permission and are a combination of middle and high school students  Boys are in blue and girls are in pink.

When I look in the mirror I see the girl who wears the blank face. The girl who struggles to be vulnerable, the girl who restricts herself from others in fear of rejection, resisting the urge to just delete that last sentence and filter herself, and her true raw thoughts, and identity. When I see her talk, everything she says feels like a cover, a projection of who she thinks you would find acceptable. A projection designed to keep others out, and the blank face at power. I see the girl who has played the part for so long it comes natural, but she never forgets who she is. I see the girl in the mirror who has been burned so many times she struggles to trust, to open up. The girl who just doesn't see the point in being vulnerable to inevitably be rejected for who she is. I see the girl who longs to be free from these standards forced upon her, what others think she must do to be acceptable. She longs to just be herself, but she just simply says wrong place, wrong time and keeps and wearing the blank face. Others worry, beg her to take off the mask, but she simply shrugs it off and reassures them, they're the reason she wears it in the first place. She'd rather keep up the act, than risk the regret that may come. When I look in the mirror I see an actor, who is forced to wear a blank face, play the role people want her to play. "The girl" others see isn't "The girl" but just a mask .. and she would like to keep it that way..... Wear the blank face until you're free.

When I look in the mirror I see someone who tries. Someone who tries and tries but ends up failing in the end. Someone who attempts, but just can't seem to win. Someone who has something to prove and needs to prove it to everybody. Someone who still sees himself as what he used to be and lowers his confidence by constantly over thinking. The man in the mirror is not someone who can moonwalk, but someone who worries himself and causes distress by always thinking of "what-ifs" and how anything and everything could go wrong. A man who needs to focus, a man who needs to practice what he preaches. A man who is capable of fixing what he needs to, but somehow never prevails and ends up slacking. I see someone who is lazy and is usually slacking on his work. Someone who is completely able, who is smart enough, but cannot apply himself. That's what I see when I look at the man in the mirror.

 

When I look in the mirror, I see a girl with potential-- potential in sports, academics, and life. I see a girl who knows if she puts in the work she will succeed, but procrastinates and postpones work to do "tomorrow". I see a girl who tries to make others smile and feel loved, a girl that wants to be a shoulder to cry on, and a girl who would do anything for the people she loves. If there was one thing that defines this girl, it would be the Golden Rule. I see a girl goes out of her way to be the friend everyone needs, but at the same time, I see a girl that won't go out of her way to study hard enough for school. I see a girl who values making memories and having fun with friends over preparing for the rest of her life. I see a girl that wants the romantic high school life that her friends have, but she rejects that idea for and of herself. Still, I see a girl that's anxious about the future and scared to decide on a job. I see a girl that wants too many things in life and refuses to choose. I see a girl that is determined to make a living from the activities she loves. I see a girl that can, but won't. I don't know why she won't, but I'm making her. I want her to succeed. I want her to be happy. I want her to live a life without regrets. I want her to get a good job she enjoys so she can accomplish her dreams. I want nothing but the best for her, so I'm going to be the girl that gives it to her.

When I look in the mirror I see someone who is gradually getting better over time. I see somebody who looks for the challenge in life. I see a future doctor that loves to help people. But when I’m away from the mirror, I become somebody who is tired. Somebody who wishes his life was better. Somebody wishes they could be more outgoing. Someone who doesn't fit where they belong no matter the puzzle piece. I am somebody who throws a brick at anyone who gets close because of past experiences. Somebody who never satisfied. Somebody who puts too much effort into people. But at least I know that he who looks back at me in the mirror will always be there with me.

When I look to see my reflection I see a girl who strives to look perfect. Every night before she goes to bed, she spends at least 5 minutes looking at herself pointing out her imperfections. When I look into the mirror I see a girl who questions her every action and asks if it will satisfy the people around her. She always puts others before herself and never has time to think of what SHE wants.I also see a girl with the perfect image of her dad but the mother wants the girl to reflect in her image. But way back in that mirror that's on the verge of cracking, there's still a little girl in spirit who wants to run around free. There's also a girl who has so many talents she can't chose which one to finalize. That girl is surrounded by so many people who support her but sometimes she doesn't notice.

When I look in the mirror I see a boy that's mind is wandering, wandering on random ideas that he has but can't do them because he is lazy. In the mirror I see a boy that is hidden in the background, a quiet kid, in the shadows, that dreams. I see a boy that just wants to know more and more, always curious about how things work, wondering, discovering, dreaming. I see a boy that wanting to build, design, create, to satisfy his curiosity, make his dreams come true, and when they do, he starts it all over again, dreaming, wondering, discovering, building, designing, and creating. Always the same thing over and over again. Doesn't know anything else to do except the same thing over and over again, the same, the same.

Applicable quote of the day:
"The ravaged face in the mirror hides the enchanting youth that is the real me."
Mason Cooley

God bless,
Steve
Luke 18:1

Looking In The Mirror

 

Looking In The Mirror

We worked on one of my favorite assignments in our classes last week. Back in October, one of our written memory verses was James 1:22-24:
"Do not merely listen to the word and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says. Anyone who listens to the word but does not do what it says is like a man who looks at his face in a mirror and after looking at himself, goes away and immediately forgets what he looks like.''
We discussed the meaning and I brought up that Mom, in her late stages of Alzheimer's, did not recognize her own image. I told the kids that sometimes at the end of the day, I look at myself in the mirror, and don't always like what I see. I talked about Paul's reference to mirrors in 1st Corinthians 13:12 and read examples from my students of ten years ago. The kids finished this statement: 'When I look in the mirror, I see....' Every student was allowed complete confidentiality. My students were very honest. Over the next few nights, I'll run some of the responses of those who wanted to share.  Some will choke you up. All are used by permission and are a combination of middle and high school students  Boys are in blue and girls are in pink.

When I look in the mirror, I see a girl who tries her hardest to please her parents and their dreams for me. I see a girl who loves herself but is brought down by what others say. I see a girl who has dreams and wants to become a great person but struggles to find her path through the right and the wrong. I see a girl who is confident on the inside and wants to show it, but finds it complicated when other people shine brighter. I see the girl who wants to find her insecurities and make them a beautiful thing. I know when I look in the mirror, I am powerful because I can see Jesus standing by my side.

When I look in the mirror I see a boy who has made many mistakes in his short time of living, with many years to come. I see a boy who looks in the mirror and thinks about how he could be better and impress the people around him or make them smile or make people laugh. I see a boy who wants to become a respectable well-rounded man but has no motivation to do so. I see a boy trying to find a spot for Jesus in his life but can't seem to do so. I see a boy who wants to make everything right without causing trouble. He wants to have the time of his life doing the things he needs to do instead of just brushing them off, forgetting about them as if they weren't important. I see somebody who wants to become something good while enjoying life and doing the things he wants to do all while keeping everybody happy.

When I look in the mirror, I see a girl still learning to appreciate who she is and how she looks. I see the girl who cuts herself down because she isn't the smartest or the most athletic and feels hopeless because of it. I see a girl compared to her brother. I see a girl who is slowly learning that every part of her is a mixture of her family and that what makes it beautiful. Her eyes are my mother's eyes, her nose is my father's nose, her ears my grandfather's and her smile my grandmother’s. I see a girl who sometimes judges herself too harshly with every mistake she makes. I see a girl who is tired of everyone talking about college and the future because as much as she tries to deny it, she's not ready to grow up. When I look in the mirror I see someone who never feels like she’s good enough for the love that is unconditionally surrounding her.

When I look in the mirror I see a boy who does not know his future. This frustrates him; he wants to know but he cannot grasp a future that would make himself happy. I see a boy who does not smile. I see a boy who will never accept himself at the top; he can never be number one, he must be number two. I see a boy scared that he is unlovable. I see a boy who struggles with temptation and loses often. While the boy is scared to be number one, he will not accept a loss. I see a boy partially proud of overcoming past struggles but still fighting his problems daily.

Hey there is a mirror, let’s go see what we look like today. Wow, there is a lot going on here. Where do we even begin? How could there be so much, yet we only ever see so little? Let’s start here. I see a young man who strives every single day to be the best that God made him to be. Still young in life, he often feels much older than he really is. A young man with flaws too numerous to count, but yet people still love him anyway. I guess it’s because everyone has flaws and he’s not the only one. But through his flaws and all his wrongs, God still finds a way to bring glory and honor to his kingdom. People see a very gifted and talented young man who is going places in this world. I see a man still trying to figure out why he often feels different, yet truly wants to serve God to the fullest. God sees his child, whom he loves so much that he sent his son to die for him and everyone else in the world. Hey, this mirror is starting to seem like it has more than one dimension.

When I look in the mirror, I don't know who I am. I see a failed reflection. I see a girl, who puts her talents locked up in a case, and hides it under her heart. I see a girl who chases dreams too far from her reach, only to see it was impossible to reach for the stars. I see a girl’s creative thoughts being praised, but she quickly turns them down. When I look in the mirror, I see a helper, a girl who tries to assist in any situation anyone is going through. I see an influence, impacting everyone around her. I see a calm, controlled girl, who takes care of her emotions even in the toughest of times. I see a creative, talented, pretty, smart, quiet girl. When I look in the mirror, I see me. The mirror might get shattered, stolen, or even misty. But in the end, I am only my reflection, even when I can't see it.

Applicable quote of the day:
"Stop saying these negative things about yourself. Look in the mirror and find something about yourself that's positive and celebrate that!"
Tyra Banks

God bless,
Steve
Luke 18:1

The Truth Will Set You Free

 

The Truth Will Set You Free

Several years ago, in my ESL Bible class, I told my students how excited I was to celebrate, being half Asian because my mom was from Thailand. Some of the American kids in there have known me for years but only one, Annalize, challenged the statement- the rest simply accepted it because they trust me. This post is from 10-25-05 and is one of my very earliest posts.

One of the great things about teaching is that kids believe you. One of scariest things is that... kids believe you. Even with the erosion of trust in authority figures over the past several decades, students, especially younger ones, accept what we say and sometimes almost with blind faith. Allow me to illustrate.

Besides my teaching responsibilities in the Bible department at Westbury Christian School, I am also the middle school girls' basketball coach. We have a practice period built into our schedule at the beginning of the school day and I always come dressed in my coaching attire of shorts, T-shirt, running shoes, and whistle. In late October, the weather in Houston cools off a bit and I add long pants to my basketball wardrobe. Last year, right after the weather change, I came one morning wearing medical scrub pants to cover my legs. (During summer mission trips to Honduras, many of our group wear scrubs- they are light weight and easy to wash and have ready for the next day of work.) This particular morning, I ran into one of my players who arrived early. I have to preface the following conversation by saying I like to kid with my players and students and assume they know when I am serious and when I am being facetious. It started with a question.
"Coach, why are you wearing those scrubs?"
"Well, you may not know this but besides being a coach and teacher, I am also a doctor. In fact, I'm leaving as soon as school is over today, running to the hospital, and performing a heart transplant."
That was about as outlandish a statement as I can think of but listen to the response of the young lady.
"Coach, you must get really tired!"
She never questioned anything I said. This seventh grader trusted me implicitly and it never crossed her mind that I might be telling her something just a LITTLE bit untrue. It also isn't that she is naive about doctors- her mother is an RN and she has grown up around around the medical community. By the next morning, I was feeling guilty about letting the joke go on that long so I called her over and tried to backtrack. It wasn't that easy.
"Hey, hon, I'm not really a doctor. I was just pulling your leg."
She was not convinced.
"Let me ask you a question,Coach. Where did you get those scrubs?"
I responded truthfully.
"From a medical supply store."
Her response? 
"I knew it-you are a doctor!"
I think by the end of the school year she finally was convinced that my second profession was a hoax but there may still be a lingering doubt. Once a child has a belief, it is difficult to shake it. What a responsibility we have to be truthful and honest with the innocents. Jesus warned about the consequences of leading children astray. It isn't hard- they want to believe those they love and respect and that should be a wake up to all who deal with children. I saw a sign in our hallway in the past that said, "When it doubt, tell the truth." We can do better than that- just leave out the 'when in doubt' part. As a reformed, if not renowned, heart surgeon, I can tell you. It's the only way.

Applicable quote of the day:
"Honesty is the first chapter in the book of wisdom."
Thomas Jefferson


God bless,
Steve
Luke 18:1

Take Your Best Shot

 

Take Your Best Shot

We are in off season basketball mode. We practice each day but for a shorter time than in the season and working mainly on offensive skills! This is from August 22, 2006.

My middle school basketball team has a practice period built into our schedule. Only two young ladies trying out for the squad have played in a junior high game so we are very inexperienced. Contrary to what you hear coaches say, we concentrate almost exclusively on offensive skills which are more difficult to master than defensive techniques. Today, we began working on shooting. We (Christian Chevis, my student assistant, and me) break shooting down into easy-to-learn repetitive steps. We get in a stance. We shoot an imaginary ball concentrating on follow through. We lay on our backs and mimic our shooting stroke, again without the ball, and rewind each shot like a video tape. We use mirror form drill where the girls have a partner critique their form on an imaginary shot. In fact, we do fine... until we add the ball. Once we begin actually shooting, technique takes a back seat to result and we forget everything we have so diligently worked on. We instantly revert to bad habits. The kids judge themselves in shooting by only one criterion- whether the ball goes through the basket. If it does, they consider it a good shot regardless of their form. A high school coach in Tennessee did something that was very smart. When teaching shooting to his players in spring practice, he would place a lid on the rim, making it impossible for the ball to go through the cylinder. In doing so, he hoped to eliminate the players worrying about they perceived to be success, i.e., making the shot. I wish it were that easy.

Life imitates the shooting of a basketball. It's not hard in theory but in the practical stage, the skill breaks down quickly. It's easy to say what we would do in a situation until we are actually in the real-life arena. It's like adding the ball. Nobody knows if you make or miss your practice attempts without the basketball. I tell the kids to visualize each imaginary shot swishing through the nets. Mental success is easy; practical success is not. Life, particularly the Christian life, is not lived in a vacuum. It's easy to memorize Jesus' teaching in the Sermon On The Mount but we find it excruciatingly difficult to actually fulfill his commands when we put the Bible down and leave the sterile environment of our homes. I can teach thirteen year old girls how to shoot but shooting in a setting that matters, a game, is up to them. I can devour the scriptures in the comfort of my apartment but it does no one else any good until I put it to use outside my door. Will my girls learn to shoot? The jury is out. Half of them are also in my eighth grade Bible class studying the gospel of Luke. The more important question then becomes, will they learn how to live? My prayer is that they do. That's how we should judge coaches and teachers.

Applicable quote of the day:
"We're shooting 100%: 60 % from the field and 40% from the free-throw line."
Norm Stewart/ University of Missouri Basketball Coach

God bless,
Steve
Luke 18:1