Wednesday, December 05, 2012

Mirror Reflections V

The memory verse we learned last Tuesday in all five of my classes was James 1:22-24:
"Do not merely listen to the word and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says. Anyone who listens to the word but does not do what it says is like a man who looks at his face in a mirror and after looking at himself, goes away and immediately forgets what he looks like.''
We discuss the meaning and I bring up that Mom, in her late stages of Alzheimer's, did not recognize her own image. I tell the kids that sometimes at the end of the day, I look at myself in the mirror, and don't always like what I see. The kids finished this statement: 'When I look in the mirror, I see....' Every student is allowed complete confidentiality and some years, I do not even read any that request privacy. My students are very honest; some of their reflections will choke you up as you see yourself during your teenage years. Over the next few nights, I'll run some of the responses of those who were willing to share; boys are in blue and girls are in pink. These will be a mixture of 8th graders-freshmen-sophomores-juniors-seniors.

Whenever I look in the mirror, I see a fake smile that hides how I really feel inside: scared and worried. I see a smile that sometimes does exist, but only around certain people. I see a girl, only doing what she does to please her family when she really hates it. I see a young girl who doesn’t know if she has real or fake friends. She is worried that she will lose everything that she has because of one mistake she makes, but she knows she will have God. Lastly, I see a girl who is judged by the way she looks and not by her heart, which no one sees.

When I try to see the future, all I see is a mirror. I see what I let myself and others see. I see a suppressed past for the things he has done. I see a bully who used to hurt not to feel better about himself but just for the fun of it. I see a liar who caused trouble on others just to avoid punishment. I see a thief that couldn't have what he wanted so he took it for himself. That is what I used to see. Now I see hope, love, I see... a change.

When I look in the mirror I see what I want to see. I see a girl with a bright future and kind heart. I see a girl who just wants to make her family proud. I see all the great things about myself because I’m too afraid to see the bad. I see a girl who covers her past, and covers all the pain she went through. I see a girl who’s too afraid to mess up. I see a girl who tries to do what people expect from her. Lastly, I see a girl who wants to succeed, and not go down the wrong path. I see a girl who only tries to see the good in herself, instead of the bad.

When I look in the mirror, I see imperfection. I see a kid too cocky for his own good. I see a kid struggling with past mistakes, and future insecurities. I see a conflicted young man, one who strives for the best in everything except the important things: his family and his schoolwork. But I also see a fighter. I see someone who God has given great victories. I see a young man with a yearning to become closer to God. I see flaws and dark spots, yes, but I also see hope and a purpose, God’s purpose.

When I look in the mirror I see a stranger- someone who is outspoken, immoral, and a bad example. But when I look closer, I see a little girl huddled in a corner
afraid and alone. I see someone who is terrified of letting anyone in out of fear of getting hurt. Looking closer, I see a heart battered, bruised, and bleeding but still intact and standing strong. When I look in the mirror, I see a lamb pushing against the wind, trying to go home.

When I look in the mirror, I see a girl who has lots of friends now who is working so hard to build relationships with them. She's worked so hard all of her life to find true friends. On the inside, I see a little girl who would cry at night because people tease and make fun of her. I see the nerdy girl with no friends. I see the girl who moved right after she made and built a really good relationship with her best friend. I see a girl who is lost and who really doesn't know who are her actual friends, if she has any. I see an ugly girl with acne but somehow people say she is pretty- she doesn't know if it's a lie or compliment. I see a girl searching for a better relationship with God.

When I look in the mirror, I see a young man struggling to find God, a young man who likes things almost no one else does. I see a young man ridiculed and made fun of for liking those same things. When I look in the mirror, I see a young man who hates who he is but accepts who he is and lives with it. But inside that person in the mirror, I see hope.

When I look in the mirror, I see someone who will do anything to achieve his goals. I see someone who disobeys God because he gets caught up in worldly things. I see someone who will always defend his family, no matter what the consequences. I see someone who will stand high when he does something correctly and fall in defeat for days when he does something wrong. I see someone who says it's time to make a change but the next day, goes and makes the same mistake.

Applicable quote of the day:

God bless,
Luke 18:1
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