This December 18, I will officiate the wedding of Tiffany and Tony. As in other recent weddings I have officiated, I used Grandpa Hawley's vows that he wrote for my parents' wedding. They are old fashioned and old people love them. (Without those vows, there would be no me!) Here is an entry about Grandpa and Grandma Hawley and their marriage from June 27, 2007.
My routines go awry when I spend time at my parents' home. Last night, I found myself watching back-to-back NBC television shows about romance. In the first one, Age Of Love, a tennis star has to choose between two groups of women competing for his affection. The catch is that half the women are in their twenties and half are in their forties. (Why does a millionaire athlete need a twenty-first century version of The Dating Game to find love?) Next on the prime time line up was Science Of Love, an experiment to find out if instincts or chemical engineering are more effective in fostering a romantic connection. In this offering, a bachelor was allowed to choose one of fifty young ladies pre-selected for him. The makeshift couple went on a date. Next, the same man was paired with a woman picked by the computer as his perfect match. This impromptu twosome also went on a date, which was manipulated 'scientifically' to kick start feelings for one another with certain foods and exciting scenarios. After both dates, the lucky guy chose the lucky girl he wanted to start a relationship with. It was very contrived which I guess is the point of both shows in the first place. I find it interesting that all the women vying to be chosen are very attractive and wouldn't seem to be in need of any additional assistance for their love lives. My guess is some of them just want to be on television.
Earlier in the week, Dad told me the previous day would have been his parents' eighty-fifth wedding anniversary had they still been alive. I barely remember their fiftieth and the reception we had for them in Michigan. Grandpa and Grandma Hawley were engaged for four years and communicated with flowery letters which are now in the possession of my father, probably unread for those eight-plus decades. How did they find each other without the aid of media matchmakers? I feel sorry for them; they missed out on a chance for a national TV courtship! And yet, they managed to keep their wedding vows intact until death came between them. This morning, I was with my dad as we took Mom to St. Luke's Hospital in St. Louis, fearing she had suffered a stroke. He rode with her in the ambulance and sat with her in the four hour hour interval in the emergency room until her admittance for the night and maybe beyond. They don't show that side of love/commitment on those so-called reality shows. Mom only had a heart arrhythmia but it was really scary- Alzheimer's victims can't communicate much to begin with. We'll be back up at St. Luke's tomorrow- Dad has an unrelated appointment of his own there- and hopefully Mom can come home with us. When we return to their home, I hope it works out where I can catch the next episodes of Age Of Love and Science Of Love. Otherwise, how am I ever going to find out how love is supposed to work?
Applicable quote of the day:
"Marriage is our last, best chance to grow up."
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