Friday, November 18, 2011

The Beneficiary

Yesterday, I ran an entry entitled The Date which I penned three years ago. It spoke of the way Jennifer Smith's folks introduced her to the proper manner of courtship. For the past several days, the students in my classes have weighed in with their views. To wrap up this series, here are the words written on 11-20-08 by Mike White, the man blessed to be married to the stunningly beautiful and gracious Jennifer. (Mike is our guidance counselor at WCS. He has accompanied me to Honduras and guided many students along their educational and spiritual paths. There is a cryptic reference to a 'fake' wedding. Mike and Jennifer got married without telling anyone and kept it a secret for a month....but that is another story for another day!)

I have been very moved by the comments of your students. I have been forwarding these to Jennifer so that she can realize the impact this event has had beyond her. I guess this is what my professors were trying to teach when we discussed the “butterfly effect.” Hopefully this will be a positive event for both the young men and young women of your class. Allow me to give you my perspective on this story.

I am the beneficiary of this event more than anyone else. I have been blessed to be married to the most wonderful woman in the entire world. I am thankful to God for her. I am also thankful that her parents were wise enough to teach this valuable lesson to my companion. I am thankful that she will only expect the best from me. I pray that Madison will see this and expect only the best from the one she chooses as her mate and companion. More than anyone else in the entire world, I have been impacted by this story. I did not know Jennifer at the time. In fact, we lived two time zones and about two thousand miles and five states apart. I did not realize that our paths would cross seven years later in a state and city in which neither of us planned on living.

I knew in my heart that God had someone for me and that person would be special. I had faith that God was preparing her for the day in which we would commit ourselves not only to each other but to our family for the remainder of our lives. Jennifer Smith believed the same thing about her future spouse. That God was preparing him for the very same day. My parents did not take me on my first date, but did expect that I treat any young lady with the highest amount of respect. They also expected that I would not “settle” for someone who would not be a great wife and mother.

On the day of our wedding (yes, the fake one), we had our parents read a letter to each of us. It was amazing to think of these two families that existed on opposite ends of the country, but similar values and the same God raised two children that would eventually come together and build their own family. As hard as it is for this father to realize it, I have faith that somewhere there is another family with similar values and the same God that is preparing a little boy that I will some day call my son in law for the day in which he will commit himself not only to my daughter, but their family.

I also hope that Drew notices how I treat his mother. I will expect him to treat any lady with the same respect. I also have faith that a family is preparing a young girl for the day she will commit herself to my son and their family. I look forward to the day that I can call her my daughter in law. I am humbled by the great responsibility of being a parent with such a great task. I can only do this with God. Maybe I should say, only God can do this and He does it through me.

Michael White
Director of Guidance
Westbury Christian School

God bless,
Luke 18:1
E-mail me at


Luis said...

Hey Coach Hawley, i just felt like saying hi because i never comment on any of your blogs. So i thought this would be "KINDA" the same but then again it's not the same. I also wanted to remind you that you are an awesome teacher!! well this is all for now.

-Luis Hernandez

astrosfreak09 said...

Coach, even though I haven't read the other stuff about this subject, I have to say, I love Coach White's response. It's like you said in class, he puts her on a pedestal. And I love don't see it very often any more. Women are treated more like objects now rather than people. The way Coach White treats his wife and kids is the way people should be treated. And you're right, he's much more than just a counselor. He's a great husband, father, and later in life, I'm sure will be a great father in law.
It takes a lot of respect and courage for a person to be able to treat someone as well as he does. And I think it takes even more respect and love to be able to write about his family the way he did.
I love that. It's a good way to wrap things up Coach!
See you tomorrow!
Downtown Brown