Thursday, October 16, 2014
Clean Shaven Man
Several years ago, my assistant coach, Katy, and I were talking about how long it takes for guys to get ready in the morning compared to ladies. I told her I shave twice and Katy told me her Dad does the same. This entry, from November 18, 2005, is about my struggles with the razor.
I hate shaving; it's a necessary evil. Flossing, washing dishes, and cleaning contacts (in pre-Lasik days) also fall into this category. I'm not good at shaving; once I took a hunk out of my ear. I shave twice, a once-over with my Norelco electric razor and then scrape myself with a blade. I still end up with stubble. Part of my problem has to do with equipment. My Norelco is old and it gets clogged. I buy inexpensive shaving cream- I would say cheap but that sounds harsh. Until several years ago, I also purchased inexpensive blades, aka Bic Disposable Razors. Have you seen those commercials for insulin testing devices for diabetics? The main selling point is less blood loss. The same can't be said for the Bic. If the Red Cross could have bottled the blood extracted from my face/neck during the Bic days, I would have earned one of those five gallon pins. Some mornings, when in a hurry, I would use the Bic with no shaving cream. Those were never good days for school pictures.
Two years ago, a student changed my grooming habits. Her name is Tiffany Brigham, one of the finest young ladies on the planet. I must have mentioned my shaving travails in class because Tiffany gave me a terrific gift- a Gillette Mach 3 Razor with GOOD BLADES. Now a close shave was possible and a smooth face like those guys in the commercials was attainable. But, I have fallen into another rut. I use them too long. My current blade was snapped into place four months ago, almost to the day. After 120 days of use, it is, shall we say, on the dull side. This morning, I had to repeat the blade/shaving cream process. Does stubble remain? It's not quite Sherwood Forest but it's still pretty scratchy. I've made an executive decision- time for a new blade.
There are things we have to keep up with in life or they get out of control. If I choose the scraggly look for several days, shaving gets harder and I'm more likely to end up with gashes on my cheek and chin. Once, I let my beard grow for months. When I cut it off, my face looked like I had been in a fight- and lost. Sin is like that. It's much easier to take care of it at the outset. The longer we flirt with it, the more we get tangled up in it and then the harder it is to extricate ourselves without damage. The scriptures speak of a daily walk. When we test and check ourselves everyday, the less likely we are to have spiritual stubble. I have a set time to shave every a.m.- if it doesn't happen then, it won't get done . I read the Bible each day. If I don't do it when I get up, it won't get done. One day off leads to another which leads to a third, etc. We can't let our religious grooming slide. Like my face, it can get ugly very quickly.
Do you remember those razor blade commercials where the actor scraped his face with a credit card to check the closeness of his shave? If I did that today with my cash card, I am sure the ATM would reject it. But I'm planning on turning over a new leaf. I pledge to change blades every three months instead of four. The Gillette people will be all over that! Could a commercial be in the works? If the Subway sandwich people can make an ordinary guy like Jared Fogle their spokesman just because he lost 245 pounds, think what the razor industry can do with a face like mine! The billboards, the magazine ads, the TV spots with the gorgeous woman- it's inevitable. And I owe it all to Tiffany Brigham and the Mach 3 Razor! Who said America isn't the land of opportunity?
Applicable quote of the day:
"Getting ideas is like shaving; if you don't do it everyday, you're a bum."
E-mail me at firstname.lastname@example.org
Posted by Steve Hawley at 8:42 PM